Mon, 31st March, 2026
March happened. It just so happens to also be that March is usually the first month of the year where you actually start feeling like the new year is going on. January is still kind of like December, and February flies by so fast it might as well not be there. March however, exists far enough from the residual energy of the year end holiday period and close enough to springtime that it finally feels like the beginning of the year.
It has been a while since I bothered to write anything, both in here and otherwise. And with the March blessings, maybe it is time. What this means to me is that I didn’t have many prolonged introspective sessions, and was mostly on the move and keeping busy mentally, which is true. Not that many notable developments happen in the winter, and in my case things have been generally good, so a stable good is as good as it gets, pretty much.
I have treated myself to a new computer - a shiny new iMac. In theory this makes for a great setup for focused working, researching, typing, but as it turns out it is just as good at distraction as anything else. Still worth it though.
I remember when we didn’t all have laptops, tablets, and smartphones, and the only kind of computer we had was the family PC, often on its dedicated desk with shelves for its components and CDs and whatnot. This is the first time in years that I again have this kind of desk computer setup, and it is still just as great of a way to interact with one. It feels more purposeful for a computer to have its own dedicated space. Makes it feel like it has more of a soul, just like the classic family PC.
A couple of days ago I thought about the moon. It was somewhat surprising when I realised I haven’t in a while, since it was for a long time a sort of a spiritual connection of mine. Something about it, just as a celestial body, calls out to me and I would look at it and feel at peace. Almost as if saying “you, over there in the night sky, you’re the one who truly gets it.”
Before I begin to sound too strange, I think of the common way we as humans form bonds with inanimate object, and sometimes even symbols. I am not religious but I do accept that there is a sort of a universal spiritual truth that persists beyond any religion or figure, and is as constant as any laws of physics are, and everything spiritual we do is simply our way to understand something we do not have a way of directly perceiving. And with the way we feel close to symbolic things, and get attached to objects or motifs, the idea that this being a kind of a small ritual through which we are exercising this part of our need to connect with this constant does not feel like a crazy thing to me.
Or perhaps, it is not the objects that are holding any deeper truths, but ourselves. Maybe when we are connecting with something non-living or abstract, we are projecting our own essence onto it and imprinting a piece of us there. And it could just the same be that it goes both ways, and we constantly have countless interactions and inner conversations with all sorts of objects.
What does it mean then to neglect one of these connections, to let it fade out and move on to different things? Do these things feel the same longing for us as we do to them, or is our longing just a reflection of what we are, and what we are imprinting over in the first place? I have read somewhere a quote or saying that went something like, if you go out looking for God in any place in the universe, you might well find him, but what you will truly find is yourself.
So the next time I was out at nighttime I looked up, the eyes guiding me to the brightest spot in the sky. It was a Cheshire moon, giving me a big smile. “I missed you too,” I thought.